Sunday, February 3, 2008

Dating A single Mom

The woman of your dreams has finally popped up in your life. Just as you are about to make your move and reveal your interest to know her better, you find out she is a single parent. While dating a single mom may seem intimidating, once you’ve learned to navigate your way through the emotional frustrations that come with being the second or third priority on her list, and can deal with children who are resistant to change, you’ll find a rare gem indeed. There are some standard, yet unique, issues that accompany dating a single mother:

1 Planning is crucial: Remember that planning ahead has become an essential part of your new relationship. Where you may have once been able to make same day reservations to the classiest restaurant in town, you now have to be creative in coming up with ways to make sure you maintain the excitement evolving between the two of you — and make allowances for the extra body in her life that needs to be attended to.

2 Include the child: Creating dates that include her child, such as museums or the aquarium, will serve to be extremely beneficial when hurdling issues regarding her time and availability. This eliminates the need to find a babysitter, and allows her the opportunity to enjoy herself with you, instead of having to make the exhausting switch from "date mode" back to "mommy mode." It also proves that you aren’t just in this for her, which is extremely important. As a single mom, she’s no longer a single entity, she is a complete package.

3 Relationship with her child: Allow the mother to guide and dictate the pace and progress in your relationship with her child. Though you may be eager to spend time with her, it isn’t necessary to rush the process of getting to know the child. Trust levels, as well as certain comfort barriers must be surmounted with you first in order for her to feel comfortable with you establishing any type of relationship with her most cherished treasure. Don’t ignore the child until she says it’s alright, but don’t push yourself into the their life and immediately take on that "father figure" role.

1 comments:

gmr324 said...

Swaminathan,

You have really hit the nail on the head with your advice about dating a single mom and being sensitive to their situation. I, myself, am a single father and can appreciate the challenges. Your other point about finding a gem is also true in that a single mom has her priorities straight, usually has a strong value system as well.
I have a free advice blog site for single parents looking to re-enter the dating world. It will complemenent this article and is
www.singleparentromance.com

Many Thanks for Your Insights

George

Single Parent Dating Advice